Self love is one of the most important things we can do in our lives but it is also one of the biggest aspects we all tend to over look, time and time again, because of all the complications that our lives are full off, we forget to give ourselves any special treatment.
Why is self love so important? Because it is the foundation of our soul, the foundation of how we interact and love other people. If we are not in love with ourselves then we are unable to fully love other people, because without a positive self image, we are unable to open up and show meaningful love to anyone.
Having a positive self image all the time is hard and we all have our days where we look at ourselves in a negative light, by comparing our selves to others or taking on the negative words some people pass in our direction. At the end of the day if we are truly honest we are our own biggest critic, pulling ourselves apart until we can no longer see, think, feel anything good about ourselves.
The light bulb moment we need to have is “I am only me and that is more than enough”. Reminding ourselves that we don’t need to compare ourselves to the people we surround ourselves with, at work, socially or even at home. Freeing ourselves from the deprivation of growing as a person, experiencing new things and the world of our uniqueness.
“For many years I struggled with loving myself and enjoying who I am. I spent so long wanting approval from family members, people I was in a relationship with, friends etc…. That I would almost change my personality, interests, even food I liked just to fit in and be expected. But the thing is there was never an acceptance, I never fitted in because I was not being true to my self and loving who I am. It took a massive event in my life for me to realise that I can not change who I am, to live and fully enjoy life, instead I had to fall in love with myself and once I did, my life became fruitful, exciting and solid relationships where formed.” Emma (creator of Wabi-Sabi Holistic Therapy)
The thing is practicing self-love is challenging; Challenging because of the environment we find ourselves in, challenging because of the social circles we are deep rooted in, challenging because we can’t change our family members and challenging because it’s just challenging. Self love is also not about being self-absorbed, narcissistic or thinking we are above any one or any thing else.
It’s just simply about getting in touch with who you really are, deep in the foundation of your soul, pushing through your limiting beliefs and living a life that you are truly destined too.
Tips To Help You On Your Road To Self Love
Take a deep breath, give yourself a hug and say out load to yourself “I love you and you are good enough”.
- Don’t believe all the negative chatter in your head, as the inner critic inside of you is just trying to keep you safe but at the same time it is also stopping you from truly living your life to the full.
- Begin each day telling yourself 1 positive thing about yourself, this could be about how you look, your skills etc… It really does not matter what it is as long as it’s 1 positive thing about yourself that you can truly become to be-leave and will make you smile. (You can tell your self this positive thing either in your head or speak it out load. I found standing in front of the mirror and telling my reflection helped me to be-leave the truth I was telling myself.)
- Fill your body with fuel (food and drink) that not only nourishes your soul but also enables your body to be healthy, so can start to love your inner and outer skin.
- Surround yourself with people who love you for who you are and encourage you to be your true self. These people not only embrace the true you but also remind you when you are having a down day how flipping awesome you are.
- End any toxic relationships you may have. You don’t need anyone in your life who makes you feel anything less than amazing and to be honest they don’t deserve to be in your life.
- Take time out every day to calm your mind, even if its only 5 minutes. Sit your self comfortably somewhere, where it’s quiet and concentrate on your breath, breathing in and out, clearing your mind of your thoughts.
- Follow your passion, by doing the things that make you excited but also push your self further, past the stage that scares you. You know where you convince yourself it wont work or you are not talented enough. Just go and do it, you will be amazed at what you will achieve if you push yourself through the scary parts.
- Celebrate your wins and achievements, no matter how big or small. Give yourself a well done gift, for example a bottle of wine, nice meal, flowers etc.. Be proud and share with friends and family your achievements.
- Embrace who you are and all the things that make you different from the crowd. Don’t hide, stand tall with your head held high because the things that make you different also make you special.
- Write down everything you are feeling because storing all those thoughts and feelings up, is just chocking up your brain and can eventually bring you down emotionally and physically. Then I know this sounds crazy but rip up that piece of paper and burn it so you can physically let go of those negative thoughts and feelings.
There are many, many other things you can do and if I listed them all we would be here all day / night. Just remember to be patient but persistent with yourself. Loving one self fully does not happen over night, it’s evolving and something that needs to be practiced daily and can take a lifetime to master. So be kind and support yourself when you are going through a hard time.
But also at the same time forgive yourself, for that one thing (or many things) that made you feel bad, embarrassed or ashamed. Say sorry out load to your self, as it’s time to let go. You can’t change what you have done in the past but you can control your future by learning from the experience and your ability to love yourself.