If you are not extremely busy in today’s society, you are the exception and not the rule. We are all living in high gear; overextend, overachieve, and overstressed and our mind is at the point of breaking.
I was one of these people, always on the go and even when I did stop to rest my mind was in over drive, making lists, planning the next day, going over conversations that I had been involved in. There never seem to be a point in my day where my my mind was quiet and still. To be honest this was really, really tiring, I just had no energy to keep pulling me through the the next thing I had to deal with or the next situation that was just around the corner. Not only was it tiring, I could not sleep because the mental chatter going on in my head would just continue when my head hit the pillow, resulting in just being physically drained every day.
I new there was no way I could sustain this constant noise and I new it was going to make me extremely ill at some point very close in the future. I just need to tools to quiet my mind even for 10 minutes everyday (to start of with) so I could start functioning as a mother and wife to my full potential.
Through my journey of learning to silent my mind, the most important thing I learnt was I needed to “come down to earth and ground my self” and the only way I was ever going to do that was I needed to learn to breathe, not the breathing we take for granted everyday as part of our bodies make up but mindfully learn to breathe (you can about my breathing techniques here).
By learning how to mindfully breath I was able to then learn settle my mind to a degree of stillness that in return made my mind silent. And oh boy when I learnt how to to silent my mind, my life became unrecognisable. Life no longer got on top of me, my health improved in so many ways and I had so much energy that I could start embracing life to the full again. So I made quieting my mind an important part of my day to day routine, that I even noted it in my diary everyday just to make sure I found the time to be silent.
How did I learn to settle my mind to silence?
First I would I would like to point out, this did not happen for me over night, it was a long process, almost like a journey of self discovery. Every day I practised until it became a natural thing to do. There where days where I failed but I kept trying because I new deep down in my soul, to be a good mother and wife I had to be able to stop my mind from working in over drive every minute of the day.
Anchoring (Grounding) – Sit or lye on the floor in a comfortable position and place with your hands on your tummy, you can keep your eyes open or close but the most important thing is you are comfortable. As you breath in push your tummy out and hold that breath for a few seconds and then breath out, pull your tummy in as much as possible. As you breath in you are connecting with your body and bringing your mind and body to one single place or in other words you are anchoring / grounding your self. To stop you mind from wondering off and thinking about other things, say quietly in your head; Breathing in “I’m aware of my whole body”, Breathing out “I’m Aware of my whole body” will help stop your mind from wondering off and creating a noise again.
This type of mindful breathing not only connects our head to our body but it also enables us to release the past, present and future on every out breath, which clears our head of chatter and noise. With this chatter and noise released we can feel an energy of joy and happiness with every in breath, enabling us to make better decisions and our perspective on situations / life become a lot broader.
Gratitude – Some times or at different points of the day our head noise comes from negative noise. It is so easy to be upset when things do not go our way. From the moment we spill our coffee, lock our keys in the car, and forget our lunch, a spiral of circumstances can set us off into a tailspin of negativity. We have all heard the saying “I got out the bed the wrong side this morning” or “Its going to be one of those days” or “Wish I could go back to bed and start the day over again”. We have all said it to our selves or each other. We can either choose to stay in a state of discontent and let that dictate our day, or we can be grateful for the other things in our lives even if they are not present in front of us right now.
Do you ever notice that when something nice happens, we tend to smile for a moment and then move on? I know I do, however, when something goes wrong, we feel the need to tell everyone and anyone that will listen.
It is in those exact moments when things seem to be going wrong that we need to focus on what we are grateful for and that is how we can instantly change our perspective. attitude and negative head noise. Keeping the focus on gratitude offers your mind something to smile about, regardless of outside circumstances. Focusing on people, places, and even things that make us grateful, gives our mind a break from negativity and introduces positivity through these positive memories. The next time you are waiting for the kettle to boil and all you want to do is scream cos the day just is not going the way you planned, think about a positive memory.
Stay in the Moment – Being in the moment has become a cliché; however, if you really take the time to focus on what it means, you can start to practice quietening your mind. Focus on what you are doing at the exact moment while you are doing it.
For example, If I am washing the dishes, I focus on the water, the soap bubbles and the dish in my hands. How does the water feel, is it warm, too hot, too cold? What shapes are the bubbles creating, are the colours in the bubbles all the same or are some of the bubbles more of a sold colour than others, how do the bubbles feel when I run my hands through them etc…..
When you take time to do this, you mind will be in the moment (silent) and chattering away about what you are meant to be doing in two days time, what is left to do on your to-do-list, the emails you need to send or remembering what the children need for school the next day.